The doctor said, in the writing where I was reading about this whole event: “What followed was a long and startling story that I immediately regretted asking for.”
That’s pretty much exactly what he said, he just took a long time to say it, which was what led to the deep, deep regret on the part of the doctor. He was dusting up on a ladder, drinking tea, totally naked, and then he fell, and oh no look what has happened now.
Knowing how an injury happened can let them know to look for something you might not have considered. For example, if you come in with a broken arm and tell them you fell off a ladder, they might poke around to see if you broke anything else. If you really did wind up with something forcefully shoved in an orifice, they would want to pay careful attention for tears and such.
Without any basis of expertise in any aspect of this topic, a sharp, forceful motion seems more likely to cause damage than a slow pressure. Also, if someone genuinely fell on something, they probably didn't do any prep work; whereas a deliberate insertion might involve things like stretching and lubrication (but probably not in this context).
But regardless I'm at the hospital for them to remove a teacup from my ass. I am not leaving this hospital until the teacup comes out of the asshole in question. They're going to be working closely in that area anyway, I would think checking for contusions would be standard practice. It's not like the relative insertion speed of this teacup is going to break my elbow as well, any injuries are going to be generally in the same zip code.
while i dont disagree with you, two things. It probably wouldn't end up in your ass, and two, it would probably be very apparent, your rectum is incredibly fragile and will essentially implode at the sight of literally anything spooky.
If they did fall on it, they would almost certainly be joking about it, doing a haha funny about how the "yeah and then i fell on it" happened, rather than given a long and draw out story about how they "fell on it"
Perhaps you were naked in your pottery shop refinishing the teacup using, say, an oscillating sander, and the hot, newly roughened surface of the rim of thd teacup was propelled violently into your anus. What could potentially be observed as contusions in and around your anus should also be investigated and treated for abrasion and burns.
Or, in fact, you were naked, having a magic tea party in the bathroom with what, through conversation it is revealed, were your imaginary friends while you were tripping on research chemicals. The 3rd cup of "tea" you were drinking started to taste like cinnamon as your ass began to feel so incredibly empty. We might need to do a specific tox screen for the party drugs, and the mystery tea you might have found under the bathroom sink. Some of that mystery tea could also have spilled in your ass, by way of the teacup vehicle. The blunt trauma wounds on your anus may be masking chemical burns.
With imagination, developed from observing human behavior, it is relatively easy to appreciate the benefit of medical staff asking questions and getting answers.
With imagination, developed from observing human behavior, it is relatively easy to appreciate the benefit of medical staff asking questions and getting answers.
if these were the expected answers, i would only be asking.
No, it's his friend's magical teacup that goes wherever you command it. This poor victim just wasn't careful with his incredulous utterance when his friend told him about it.
The implication that not only did he not just put it up there, but that there was a whole boatload of context that neither of them were happy to know of
The internet is full of delightfully horrifying tales like that. Just yesterday, I got to witness a few people regretting asking about the pony jar. (Don't look that one up either)
This has been a story about some people who were punished entirely too much for what they did. They wanted to have a good time, but they were like children playing in the street. We really all were very happy for a while, sitting around not toiling but just bullshitting and playing, but it was for such a terrible brief time, and then the punishment was beyond belief: even when we could see it, we could not believe it.
I love that even after millennia of human society and culture, I still regularly run into comments that make me think, "Yeah, that's the first time anyone has ever said that."
If the universe is truly infinite and as homogeneous as it appears to be, then an infinite amount of people had already said that, will say that and are saying it right now.
Infinite possibilities does not mean all possibilities. It is possible - even probable, in most cases - to have an infinite set which does not contain all possible members.
As an example, the set of all even numbers and the set of all whole numbers are both infinite sets with completely different contents. Even accounting for the fact that the set of all whole numbers contains the entire set of all even numbers, the two will still differ by a factor of 50%.
Gold and silver are safe. Lead is dangerous for completely unrelated reasons. Cupric alloys are probably safe assuming you aren’t allergic. Speaking of allergic you can definitely do nickel if you’re completely not allergic to it. Aluminum should be safe.
Not metallic and not sure about ‘alternative uses' but ceramic is good for finger rings at least. It's non-conductive, you can use a pliers or tap it hard with a hammer to shatter it if needed, and if it snags on something in a horrific accident scenario it'll usually shatter before degloving or severing a finget
That must be the case but at the same time it makes me wonder why titanium rings aren't made with the shatter resistant alloy, or why it's expensive to get a titanium wedding band that shatters easily but apparently titanium cock rings are common and affordable enough that there's an ER PSB out on it.
There actually are reasons you want an alloy to break easily, street signs are designed to do this to minimise vehicle damage in a crash while still providing resistance to halt the vehicle as an example.
As for the cock rings, if you asked the metal shop owner that got commissioned for it, they'll get a thousand yard stare before commenting that it isn't even close to the most "intimate" custom order they've been paid for.
Titanium camping cutlery definetly doesn't shatter, it bends like steel. But it does scratch easily so maybe your rings used a harder alloy to prevent scratches
Also, the ER probably wouldn't need to resort to cutting a cock ring in the first place. It has no bones, just get some ice packs on it or worst case scenario do a controlled bleed on the distal portion.
They are hand powered and very cost effective for gold and silver rings. Diamond tipped cutters usually need something like a Dremel to power them. They look something like this:
They are much more expensive compared to hand powered ones, and pose a higher risk to a patient so they would require additional training to use it, which is another extra cost.
Yes! I should have clarified. Wedding rings getting stuck on old people's fingers will be the main use case for those tools, meaning people will have to buy a lot of titanium cock rings before it's cost effective for hospitals to have electric cutting tools as standard.
I feel like dicks would be a less likely candidate as there should be other ways to encourage the trapped member to decrease in size before resorting to cutting implements in close proximity
Also, ummm, titanium gets hot. Like all metal gets hot when you cut it, that's just how friction works.
But titanium is gummy.
When we cut steel it makes a nice clean chip until the tool is dull, then it'll make ugly chips.
When we cut aluminum or copper, we have to use tools with fewer teeth so they don't get clogged up with chips. This is fine because these materials are so soft and we can run cutting speeds so high that having fewer teeth isn't a big deal.
But titanium is both gummy, in that it wants lots of space between cuts because it'll clog up teeth, and very hard, in that it wants lots of teeth making smaller cuts.
It's also a shit conductor. Aluminum and copper will whisk away heat. Titanium gets hot and stays that way.
So your titanium jewelry, wherever applied, that needs to be cut off of you, will need a diamond saw, which isn't really a cutting tool, it's an abrasive one. Meaning it works through aggressive, point blank friction.
My point is if you smash your titanium cock ring on, it's going to not only require a very uncomfortable proximity to a power tool to remove it, it's going to absolutely burn the fuck out of your dick.
Thank you for the details! I find the different properties of metals fascinating but rarely have the time to read up on it (which isn't made easier by having to first read up on and understand a bunch of terminology and underlying concepts, which my ADHD just doesn't have the patience for), so comments like yours giving a bit of insight are perfect.
Lol. There's "the jaws of life", but those don't cut. We have "cutters" that are equally bad ass and powerful, but they're still made of hardened steel, so they won't cut the titanium, and they're shaped/work like a beetles mandibles, so even if the could cut it, it would slide down on the ring before cutting. That would do a hell of a lot of damage.
