My home theater. I love movies and if someone said I couldn’t have it hooked up to the main TV I’d walk. I’d rather date someone who either enjoys it or at least it’s neutral on having there.
Also I don’t care if they have a garden. But it will be classified as a hobby, not as yard work or house work when they work in it. Because I’ll never work in one.
If it's something you want and your partner doesn't care one way or the other about, it shouldn't factor in.
If you want to make the candles you use around the house, maybe they smell nice, maybe they get used, maybe they're cheaper than store-bought, but that's a hobby.
If you do a bunch of baking, especially for people outside the home but even inside it, and your partner isn't all about you cooking, that's a hobby, and you clean up your own mess. That's not chores (unless you're getting paid).
Chores are necessities to keep the communal house going, not anything that takes effort.
I agree with the basic maintenance thing being a chore, but I understand where OP is coming from. So if one person out of the pair decides with previous warning that they want to plant a bunch of stuff then it's their responsability to take care of them.
In my situation for example, I live with my partner in an apartment, and the vases are his to maintain and take care of. We've talked about where we would live next and my parter wants a yard and I don't. So I've forewarned him that if we have a yard in a future house it belongs to him, and any decisions to move to a house with a yard come with that agreement.
This is all very different situation to living in a house with a yard already, or not having the choice when moving for some reason.
I don't expect help in the garden on an everyday basis, no way. I do what I want with it, don't take requests, so it's mine and my responsibility. But since everyone gets food out of it, they do help occasionally with bigger things; carrying dirt from front driveway to garden, building planters.
Home theater, who cares? Wouldn't everyone put that on the biggest TV? We have only one TV but if there were two of course the bigger one would make the most sense.
Oh, on that - TV in the bedroom is a no for me, too. Doesn't matter for casual, but if I am living somewhere I never want a TV in the bedroom. Music speaker yes, that's fine. TV no way. Thankfully we've had space outside of bedroom for gaming and TV and computer, that is very important to me.
Spaces are kinda better, because tabs are not consistent across editors/platforms. Just please use the tab key to indent, don't press the spacebar x times like a monkey
I personally find 2-space indented code harder to read than 4-space. If I'm working on someone else's codebase which is indented with 2-spaces then I have to cope. But if it's tab-indented then I can just edit the setting in my editor to display a tab char as 4 whitespace chars
The problem is that when you then want to align stuff, you have to use spaces. So you need to use tabs for indentation and use spaces for alignment. This is actually the perfect, objectively best way to do it, but because it requires a deliberate mix of tabs and spaces, it's too complicated to use for a large project with lots of maintainers. You just need a single maintainer doing it wrong to ruin it.
There is also the issue that you'll often see the code in a place where you can't control the tab length, i.e. printed in your terminal by some program that doesn't have an option for that, or viewed on the web, like GitHub.
As someone who has primarily used spaces, I still use the tab key. I sincerely hope most space users understand that your editor can expand your tab key into spaces, and people aren't genuinely going around spamming their spacebar 2->16 times for various indentation levels.
When someone carelessly throws their trash on the ground, that says a huge amount about their respect for other people, their feelings about the environment, and even their views on social equality.
It's a tiny thing, but an immediate dealbreaker.
People who throw their trash on the ground are the same people who yell and get mad at minimum-wage staff, while those staff hold back tears. They are the people who take more food at a buffet restaurant than they could ever even eat. They are the people who think the world and everyone in it owes them whatever they want, but without ever giving anything back.
I bet we all know a person whose car looks like a scary biohazard of old drive-through cups they haven't cleaned yet, but I'd much rather date that person than someone who throws it all out the window.
If you have one crazy ex, you have one crazy ex. If you have all crazy exes, you ARE the crazy ex. But if you have no crazy exes but a bunch of relationships that didn't work out I'd want to make sure you aren't their crazy ex.
I do have a crazy ex, it's an ongoing joke my friends talk about to this day. She tried to burn my apartment down because I had a birthday card from my sister. She peed in a solo cup and left it on my floor. She broke all the mirrors in my apartment because I didn't tell her she was pretty that day. Oh, she also threatened me with a firearm because I didn't chase her into the next room to make her feel better after an argument.
I'd say those quantify her as pretty loose in the head. Her parents were great though, we even did stuff without her because they knew how difficult she could be.
Not that you said people can't have crazy ex's, but for real, some people are just a tad unhinged. My other relationships were all fine and handled pretty well all in all.
It's a much bigger red flag if they hate everyone they've ever broken up with. That's just childish. So your shit didn't work out? Shake hands and walk along. They still have the good traits that made you consider them in the first place.
It's a much bigger red flag if they hate everyone they've ever broken up with.
"And what's the common thread here?"
I find it very promising when someone I date, when they reflect on a past relationship, is willing to admit the mistakes they made which led to the breakup and highlight the positive steps they've taken to rectify those shortcomings to become a better person and not cause future partners the same hurt. Very sexy, that.
I just can’t do it. They’re trashy and they smell terrible. Almost universally friends/partners I’ve had the smoke cigarettes ash wherever they want- like my patio or door step. I had an ex that would chain smoke, ash in front of the door, then put the cigarette out and leave it on the steps.
So now everyone that walks by sees our entryway covered in ash, cigarette butts, and burn marks. Just looks and smells like shit.
That same partner kept an ash tray in the patio. It filled up with water when it rained, and she just… left it. So now the patio smells like soppy wet shit too.
Ever since then cigs are a deal breaker for me. If you don’t respect your body how can you ever respect your environment or relationship?
Massive red flag about multiple issues from hygiene to risk-taking to basic scientific literacy to propensity for addictive behavior. The list goes on and on.