beebarfbadger

@beebarfbadger@lemmy.world

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beebarfbadger ,

Has science gone too far? Find out in the scattered audio logs left behind in the mysteriously abandoned research complex.

beebarfbadger ,

Yes, Neil deGrasse Tyson, you are very jaded and knowledgeable. Now let the rest of us have fun.

beebarfbadger ,

Next episode: The gang secure themselves a mine to gain a steady supply of blood diamonds.

beebarfbadger ,

Should still be somewhere. Maybe in the carpet or the sofa...

beebarfbadger ,

MOAR SHUGGAR!

beebarfbadger ,

Ahummm, well actually, * adjusts monocle * time travel is not possible and since nobody has invented time machines yet, neither of these scenarios would happen in reality.

beebarfbadger ,

Where's the Windsor knot?

beebarfbadger ,

Did he say YOU shouldn't publish it or it shouldn't be published?

beebarfbadger ,

. . . as we are descrwebweng below . . .

beebarfbadger ,

It's autobiographical.

beebarfbadger , (edited )

Yes, good point, but what worries me more is that the bullet point is missing where it says to gut the corpses and remove the cicada intestines and poop. Surely that's standard when eating... anything really. Make it poop-free?

CIA says whistleblower allegation touted by GOP in Joe Biden impeachment probe is 'false' ( www.usatoday.com )

In a blow to House Republicans’ impeachment inquiry into the president, the CIA refuted a whistleblower’s allegations that the agency sought to block a federal investigation into President Joe Biden’s son, Hunter Biden, on Thursday....

beebarfbadger ,

Maybe he threw a roll of toilet paper at someone and called it a day.

beebarfbadger ,

Our vultures are so fat, you wouldn't believe how full they are all the time...

beebarfbadger ,

^_^

beebarfbadger ,

It kinda does feel like spez is just testing how much he can squeeze out of the leftover marks at reddit before leaving the carcass out to dry.

beebarfbadger ,

Oh, that reminds me:

l ll ll L

I'm at a loss as to what you are trying to say.

beebarfbadger ,

Wow. They should replace that gas boiler asap.

beebarfbadger ,

"Yes, we'll drop you into a pit with a gigantic predator on whose menu you usually take the top spot, BUT it might just be fine, since we'll wrap you in the remains of another frog we flayed so that you can wear its skin."

beebarfbadger ,

My coworkers also always eat any frog I place between their mandibles.

beebarfbadger ,

No no no, that's just "Florida Man", that's the one dude you keep hearing about. Florida Georg is a statistical outlier and should not be counted.

beebarfbadger ,

I dunno, is he related to Leibniz by any chance?

beebarfbadger ,

He is and he's living on an island retreat with Elvis.

beebarfbadger ,

Are you assuming that this is the probability with which he may be elected, or the probability that Christo-fascism will take over once he is reelected? Because once he's in, all the groundwork has been laid, there's no "if" at that point anymore.

beebarfbadger ,

The richest 1% own almost half the world's wealth. The hoarders have mostly dug in and ensured that their hoarding is legal, will stop at nothing, is easier than ever, and is well defended and unopposed.

We live in the joke where the billionaire takes 99 cookies from the table, leaves one and says "Careful, peon, the [member of the minority you dislike] is after your cookie".

beebarfbadger ,

"But you can't trust the government to be put in charge of what's best for the general populace - instead, you should trust private companies who are legally obligated to maximise their shareholders' profits to use their monopolistic position in a way that's best for their victims, sorry, I mean regular people."

beebarfbadger ,

The tar pits are that experiment on a grand scale.

beebarfbadger ,

His problem is that, as a rich person in the US, he's only used to getting money, not paying any, let alone being made to pay money that he owes.

beebarfbadger ,

In order to legally classify Biden as an insurrectionist, they'd have to come up with hare-brained legal gymnastics and then they'd need, like, a majority in the supreme court to rubber-stamp their...

oh.

beebarfbadger ,

IF that executor happens to be consisting of the right party members.

beebarfbadger ,

Yeah, nope, checks out. If eating pussy estrogenises the male body,... nope, we can't have that. The logical solution is to instead suck as much dick as possible to testosteronise the body as much as possible in order to strengthen your hetero biochemistry.

beebarfbadger ,

"All metrics":

Require wages? Nope.

Get paid? Nope.

Ask for money? Nope.

Work for remuneration? Nope.

Offer services in exchange for monetary compensation? Nope.

Biden to issue executive order aimed at protecting Americans’ sensitive data from China and other ‘hostile countries’ ( www.nbcnews.com )

The measure targets the business of selling people’s personal information, which the White House said could be used “to track Americans (including military service members), pry into their personal lives," and be passed on to foreign intelligence....

beebarfbadger ,

Or, y'know, the actual government of the USA. Throwback Thursday: https://www.wired.com/story/hemisphere-das-white-house-surveillance-trillions-us-call-records/

beebarfbadger ,

"Why being a selfish prick is ACTSHUALLY GOOD so stop treating me like the asshole that I am acting like"

beebarfbadger ,

Because they wanna look like the good guys but profit from being the bad guys.

beebarfbadger ,

"The thing that the people who study and research this sort of thing for a living said would happen has happened despite you calling them hacks."

people dismissing bits of science they dislike: （°0°）

beebarfbadger ,

What's not to understand: is having sex with or without a condor your preferred option?

beebarfbadger ,

Also don't forget: the people who got wealthy off screwing all future generations will mostly be dead before facing any kind of consequences after having lived a happy life off the blood money they got from dooming our society.
So that's nice.

For them.

beebarfbadger ,

What a comforting note to end on...

We've already blown past critical 1.5 C climate threshold, sea sponge study claims. Should we believe it? ( www.livescience.com )

A controversial new study claims we may breach the 2 degrees Celsius (3.6 degrees Fahrenheit) climate change increase threshold by the late 2020s — almost two decades earlier than current projections....

beebarfbadger ,

We've been made. Abort. Abort.

beebarfbadger ,

"I see you still have like eight hours each day you could sacrifice to your employers, what's your excuse there?"

"That's when I eat and sleep."

"Ah, so greed and laziness. I see."

beebarfbadger ,

Yeah, sure, but you see, it's all THE LIBRULS' FAULT, so you basically MUST go to war to show 'em.

  1. Punish the enemy for all the things I blame them for

  2. ???

  3. Profit!

beebarfbadger ,

Yeah, once you've given the app permission to snoop out all your data, they have what they came for and don't need you to keep it any longer.

beebarfbadger ,

From the company that brought you "Fire Alarrm Silencer - because you don't want that annoying noise in your ear, right?"

What a Twist! : New study says owls may actually be able to turn their heads a full 360 degrees ( lemmy.world )

Owls have special anatomical structures that let them twist their heads all over the place, but the current consensus is the rotational limit is 270 degrees. They have twice the number of cervical vertebrae we have, and they are coiled like a spring to aid rotation, while special channels help prevent pinching off nerves or...

beebarfbadger ,

Humans can turn their head 360° too. Owls can just do it more than once.

beebarfbadger ,

"Doing it for exposure patriotism."

beebarfbadger ,

I especially like the follow-up piece "Why you should work for free: money can't buy you happiness (because you won't get any)"

beebarfbadger ,

"Sorry, but I have to lay you or Jack off."

"Could you jack off - I have a headache."

Conservatives wanted “mental acuity” to be a top 2024 election issue. It’s blowing up in their face ( www.lgbtqnation.com )

In what’s looking like one of the most bizarre choices of the 2024 election season, Republicans decided to make “mental acuity” a key issue in the presidential race – despite their likely candidate’s inability to form coherent thoughts anymore....

beebarfbadger ,

"Precedential Immulity!"

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