Texas to Celebrate 25th Anniversary of “The Green Mile” by Executing 25 Innocent People ( thehardtimes.net )
Tesla Announces Plan To Add Up-Skirt Cameras On All Vehicles ( www.theonion.com )
Study Finds Midnight Is Perfect Time for Cat to Do 14 Laps of Room Really Fast ( reductress.com )
Guy Who Hates Taylor Swift Finally Hears One of Her Songs ( thehardtimes.net )
‘Our housekeeper only worked two days a week’, Rishi Sunak outlines a childhood filled with hardship ( newsthump.com )
Game Over, Musk: Consoles Uninstall X to Avoid PR Dumpster Fire ( theglitchnews.netlify.app )
Hunter Biden withdraws from Presidential race following felony conviction ( newsthump.com )
Joe Biden’s son Hunter has officially withdrawn from the race to become President of the United States following his felony conviction for gun offences....
“You Got This” Assures Father Who Doesn’t Know How To Help with His Son’s Algebra Homework ( lemmy.world )
In a scene not too uncommon in today’s world, local dad Alan Devlin reassured his high school son, Keith, with an enthusiastic “You got this!” to cover for having absolutely no idea how to help him with his Algebra homework....
Asphalt Voyeurs: Big Auto's Scoring System Caters to Crash Fetishists ( theglitchnews.netlify.app )
Guy Envious of Coworker Too Stupid to Have His Soul Crushed By Company ( thehardtimes.net )
Asphalt Voyeurs: Big Auto's Sordid Scoring System Caters to Crash Fetishists ( theglitchnews.netlify.app )
Congress Passes Opioid Crisis Legislation After Addict Cousin Steals Their Xbox ( www.theonion.com )
Grandfather’s Eyes Light Up While Describing Memories Of Old Country Buffet ( www.theonion.com )
6 Signs The Exterminator You Hired Is On The Bugs’ Side ( clickhole.com )
Harrowing: Listen To These People Talk About The First Time They Ran Out Of Radishes - YouTube ( youtu.be )
Nvidia to Rebrand as "Nvidai" in Bold Move to Cement AI Dominance
Santa Clara, CA — In a move that's already sending shockwaves through the tech industry, Nvidia announced today that it will be rebranding to "Nvidai" to better reflect its integral role in the artificial intelligence (AI) revolution....
Trump Just One Indictment Away From Free Hoagie in Courthouse Commissary ( thehardtimes.net )
National Anti-Corruption Commission rules that some corruption is cool actually ( chaser.com.au )
New President of Mexico Warns of Remorseless Criminals North of Border ( www.borowitzreport.com )
CEO Relieved AI Can Never Replace Him If He Already Contributes Nothing To Company ( www.theonion.com )
Cult Leader Not Even Charismatic ( www.theonion.com )
Senate Passes Emergency Border Funding To Prevent Female Leadership From Spreading To U.S. ( www.theonion.com )
Former Disney World Employees Share Their Most Memorable Stories From The Park - YouTube ( youtu.be )
‘Money Isn't Everything,' Says Person Who Has It ( reductress.com )
In a completely unsurprising story out of Manhattan, NY, the words “money isn’t everything” were just spoken at brunch by someone who, conveniently, has lots of it.
Tragedy Strikes After Malfunctioning Wind Turbine Spills Wind All Over Farmer’s Field ( thehardtimes.net )
