@helplessduck@mastodon.online cover
@helplessduck@mastodon.online avatar

helplessduck

@helplessduck@mastodon.online

Control issues and perfectionism are among my many neuroses. I swear a lot. I do drugs (the good kind). I'm a socialist. I studied art in school. Cooking, Baking, US Politics, environmental conservation, mental health, my employer Ramses, That Damn Cat.
I was once called the terror that quacks in the night.
He/Him/Michael/Arrogant jackass.

Header Image: Black Bar
Avatar: Adobe Firefly generated mallard duck, wearing a crown swimming in crystal blue water.

This profile is from a federated server and may be incomplete. For a complete list of posts, browse on the original instance.

RickiTarr , to random
@RickiTarr@beige.party avatar

Many people know that Fox News paid Dominion nearly 800 million dollars, but they weren't forced to pay this, they chose to settle literally right as opening statements were about to begin. I still wonder what they had on those fuckers, or were they just terrified to get Murdoch, Hannity, and Carlson on the stand. Maybe they were all spooked after Alex Jones' 965 million dollar debacle. Either way, I hope people just keep suing the pants off Conservatives.

helplessduck ,
@helplessduck@mastodon.online avatar

@DemocracyMattersALot @RickiTarr

We'll probably never know. I'm convinced that the most nefarious fuckers among the oligarch class have realized that they can likely wait out climate change.

futurebird , to random
@futurebird@sauropods.win avatar

Creatures with scientific names that betray how frustrated the scientists got trying to sort out their taxonomy.

Probolomyrmex (multiple species)
Camponotus confusus

There have to be more of these. I'd love to know the full story behind the names. Really there is a place in the world for a book that just goes into interesting taxonomic controversies and frustrations.

Have you encountered any scientific names that hint at someone pulling out their hair?

helplessduck ,
@helplessduck@mastodon.online avatar

@futurebird

I have a few books about English language oddities that are pretty dear. They're funny. Bet this would sell pretty well even to folks without much knowledge in the biology field. I know I'd buy it. (hint)

ElleGray , to random
@ElleGray@mstdn.social avatar

my hottest take is that all the kids knew who mrs doubtfire really was and were just sitting back watching how fucked up shit could get

helplessduck ,
@helplessduck@mastodon.online avatar

@ElleGray

Highly plausible.

futurebird , to random
@futurebird@sauropods.win avatar

“Ride safe! If you get in an accident? I will kill u….”
“but that just makes it worse!”
“…to death. All the way. So you better be careful. Or Else.”
“This seems… unfair.”
“exactly”

(feelings about SOs riding motorcycles)

helplessduck ,
@helplessduck@mastodon.online avatar

@futurebird

This is like "MICHAEL I TOLD YOU TO STAY OUT OF THAT DAMN TREE! IF YOU FALL, YOU'D BETTER DIE ON THE WAY DOWN OR I'M GONNA KILL YOU MYSELF!" at my grandma's house when we were kids. 😂

futurebird , to random
@futurebird@sauropods.win avatar

Whenever complementing someone's pet I like to use the category that includes their pet along with ants.

Pet Bees "adorable hymenopterans!"
Pet Beetle "what a lovely insect"
Pet Crab "what a cute arthropod"
Pet dog "Such a charming bilaterian!"

helplessduck ,
@helplessduck@mastodon.online avatar

@futurebird

This is simultaneously worse than dad jokes, and better than dad jokes.
I'm totally here for it. 😁

futurebird , to random
@futurebird@sauropods.win avatar

...

Clearly not thinking through all of the implications of "that America"

bruh. why would YOU be able to vote if women couldn't? THINK.

helplessduck ,
@helplessduck@mastodon.online avatar

@futurebird

We are deeply, horribly, permanently ashamed of that ignorant, despicable excuse of a man, here in NC.
If he becomes governor with our rabidly conservative supermajority in the legislature, it's going to be bad. Really, really bad.
That said, the last time NC elected a republican Governor was back in 1992; so I'm only half-worried.

futurebird , to random
@futurebird@sauropods.win avatar

To anyone who thought I was lying about how much people tell me to read "Children of Time" by A. Tchaikovsky. (Which I HAVE READ, I enjoyed it! Yes I have heard of it OMG.)

https://tech.lgbt/@k9/112042747858252044

https://sigmoid.social/@jasonb/111910032711356411

https://mastodon.social/@JoeGermuska/111711673457503522

https://tech.lgbt/@ngaylinn/111195087157893988

https://infosec.exchange/@ozdreaming/111172918185620644

https://mastodon.art/@seventeenmagpie/110765397277198310

https://social.seattle.wa.us/@mosspiglet/110023164991818036

No shade to anyone who has made this suggestion. It's a great book. ☺️ I just find it funny that people keep suggesting it to me.

helplessduck ,
@helplessduck@mastodon.online avatar

@futurebird

Have you read the other two in the trilogy?
I've got them on my Kindle, but haven't cracked them yet. Children of Time was recommended to me even though this person knew I dislike sci-fi. It's not sci-fi. It's a commentary on the human condition. Loved it!

futurebird , to random
@futurebird@sauropods.win avatar

This week is my big presentation for the middle school. I plan on bringing in my carpenter ants. Currently their set up is like this drawing.

Agonizing over if I should pack up the whole thing ... or just bring in the log and one outworld. I'm worried about how half of the colony would react to spending a day cut off from the main nest.

Leaning towards bringing this whole thing in the taxicab with me.

If you see a news story about a taxi overrun with ants... I know nothing about that.

helplessduck ,
@helplessduck@mastodon.online avatar

@futurebird

:blobcattea:

FediTips , to random
@FediTips@social.growyourown.services avatar

If someone you follow boosts too much stuff, you can hide just their boosts from your timeline by doing the following:

  1. Go to the person's profile in Mastodon
  2. Click the button with three dots (looks like ︙ or ⋯)
  3. Click "Hide Boosts" or "Hide Reblogs" (they mean the same thing)

The person will not know you've done this, and it won't hide their own posts.

If you change your mind and want to see their boosts, repeat the same process but select "Show boosts".

helplessduck ,
@helplessduck@mastodon.online avatar

@FediTips

I've found that the panphy.social client handles boosts really well. The devs have implemented a "Boost Carousel" that will show up in the home timeline every so often with several of the recent boosts from folks I follow, with arrow buttons to scroll through 5, 10 or 20 boosts. It doesn't clutter the TL, and it saves the extra step of muting someone's boosts.

A screen-clip of the Boost Carousel from the panphy.social web client. The carousel takes up roughly the same space on the timeline as a standard post from a follower, but has recent boosts from folks I follow inset, so I can scroll through them in that one space. At the top of the carousel, the heading "12 Boosts" indicates that there are twelve posts in the carousel, and to the side of that heading are left and right arrows to scroll through. Most convenient!
ALT
  • Reply
    • futurebird , to random
    @futurebird@sauropods.win avatar

    Bullying isn't a "normal part of growing up" if a child is being bullied physically that is a failure of the school to protect them and a failure to create a safe learning environment.

    Psychological bullying is equally as serious but can be harder to identify. But if a child/teen comes home from school upset repeatedly. If they say they don't want to go to school. If they alter their behavior to avoid persecution this is also a failure.

    This feels obvious and basic but I'm saying it anyway.

    helplessduck ,
    @helplessduck@mastodon.online avatar

    @futurebird

    I've always hated the whole "bullying is a part of growing up" line. Even when I was a kid and being mercilessly bullied, I could see right through that crap. It's a "part of growing up" because parents, educators, everyone has normalized it, minimized it, allowed it and are tacitly encouraged it by dismissing it as trivial. Utter failure to protect kids from what could be serious harm.

    helplessduck ,
    @helplessduck@mastodon.online avatar

    @futurebird

    Exactly. Not everyone can be happy, all the time. They wouldn't know they were happy because they had never seen the other side of the coin. What a miserable life. That social awkwardness and navigating interpersonal relationships IS part of growing up. You see it in many social mammals.
    I've not read many books on rearing kids, but I don't think any of them would list "sustained psychological torture" as a fundamental part of human development.

    futurebird , to random
    @futurebird@sauropods.win avatar

    Are there therapists who specialize in helping children who are stressed out giving tech support to their parents?

    My mom is a mathematician. She can program w/ punch cards. But, she & Dad just don't keep up with tech anymore. Drives me nuts.

    Gave my dad an iPhone for Christmas. They HATE it. Probably would hate any phone. Now they say it's recording their conversations.🙄

    Dad holds down the buttons on the side when he picks it up. Activates the voice assistant... they think it's a hacker.

    helplessduck ,
    @helplessduck@mastodon.online avatar

    @futurebird

    As a person who is bound by SLA to my 87 year old, blind grandmother I can empathize like woah.
    I'm in DBT therapy for a litany of other reasons, but a lot of those skills help me keep my cool with her on the fifth call of the day about an Excel spreadsheet. Maybe that's an option?
    (I also have VNC on her machine, so I can just jump in from anywhere, and do not support her phone. I told Father to buy her an iPhone. He bought her a Samsung. Unsupported device. Boundaries.)

    GottaLaff , to random
    @GottaLaff@mastodon.social avatar

    🎯 I'm Laffy and I approve this message:

    "In private, here is how President refers to :

    “What a sick fuck”

    “What a fucking asshole this guy is”

    https://www.politico.com/newsletters/west-wing-playbook/2024/02/01/what-biden-really-says-about-trump-behind-closed-doors-00139178

    helplessduck ,
    @helplessduck@mastodon.online avatar

    @GottaLaff

    I leave to go to the vape store, and now there's a war on?
    I was gone for like... thirty minutes.
    I'm sore as hell from my car wreck, but still so livid over it, I'll mount my trusty steed and ride into battle, painted in woad with two swords drawn.

    What the hell did I miss?

    helplessduck ,
    @helplessduck@mastodon.online avatar

    @GottaLaff

    Right now, I'm willing to go to war with my cat. LOL
    I missed a bunch of stuff, I guess.

    helplessduck ,
    @helplessduck@mastodon.online avatar

    @GottaLaff

    I missed it, so... No clue.

    I'm stoned out of my mind right now. Feel free to just ignore me.
    I'll eventually just blend into the furniture or something.

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