@pathfinder@beige.party avatar

pathfinder

@pathfinder@beige.party

58 years old, ish (Yes, I'm sticking with this lie, because it still remains my only chance for immortality) Autistic and British. Into philosophy and spiritualism and pretty much anything that might explain the meaning of life, up to and including that it might really be 42.
Male, he/him

#ActuallyAutistic
#Autism
#Neurodiversity

This profile is from a federated server and may be incomplete. For a complete list of posts, browse on the original instance.

PixysJourney , to weirdfolks group
@PixysJourney@beige.party avatar

:bear_love: Ello sweet and lovely Friendos 💜

It feels all wrong... The skies are already showing some lighter areas... Normally, we'd be on the way back by now, more lights are on in some homes...

I know....

Breathe.... Just breathe... It's only for about a month...
Ugh....

:blobcat_dizzy:

My silly autism just loved the old routine...

I know that in the new town, we maybe won't be able to find such lovely SniffBook walkies routes... Maybe there are some... We'll know with time and exploring... 😊

But I just always got so calm and relaxed during the SniffBook walkies... I'm gonna miss them... Fingers crossed 🤞🏻 that Herpen will have a good route for us to find and enjoy after all the crazy is done!

:blobCat_party:

Just adjust for the next few weeks Pixy. You can do this... It will be worth it... You'll have more time in the afternoon to spend with your Friendos 💜 here...

Slowly getting through the week (which is going too fast 😂 Aaah it's mind boggling), enjoying the last walkies, making the most of it.
Just 6 more days and then... Pixy's world will get even more crazy!

:parrot_twin:

Fankoos 🫶🏻 for your support, for your kindness, for your sillyness to make me giggle when I feel bläh... I really appreciate it! :heart_rainbow:

:bear_nuzzle:

🧚🏼‍♀️ 🍀 💜 🐾



@weirdfolks

pathfinder ,
@pathfinder@beige.party avatar

@PixysJourney @weirdfolks
Neither that long before the move nor that long before you can get back into the rhythm that suits you. :bear_hugs:

pathfinder ,
@pathfinder@beige.party avatar

@PixysJourney @weirdfolks
As a hopeless night owl, I know what you mean. Just remember, it's temporary and will end up with you in a far, far, better place.

JustPassingThrough , to random
@JustPassingThrough@neurodifferent.me avatar

Didn't expect one of my closest friends to tell me he thinks the late-diagnosing of autism thing is pure crap. How do I bounce back from this invalidation? Do I even need to defend myself here? How would you react? I haven't responded yet. Funny how you'd think someone would be understanding but they aren't.

pathfinder ,
@pathfinder@beige.party avatar

@JustPassingThrough
This is so hard! I'm so sorry. Depending on your relationship and how much you value it, you could try explaining how self-diagnosing yourself as autistic isn't like diagnosing yourself with an actual medical condition. I've hopefully linked a resource gathered by the most excellent @alice that may help you to do this. But, otherwise, or if this doesn't work, it's perhaps time to reconsider the relationship. Negativity like that, is not helpful. It's hard enough coming to terms with realising something like this and dealing with the trauma of it and that resurfaces because of it, without something like this.

https://codeberg.org/alicewatson/asd-self-dx/src/branch/main

pathfinder ,
@pathfinder@beige.party avatar

@alice @alice_watson @JustPassingThrough
Deserved! :bear_hugs:

pathfinder , to ActuallyAutistic group
@pathfinder@beige.party avatar

@actuallyautistic
@actuallyadhd

After joining a post by Niamh Garvey (hopefully a successful link to it below) about whether she had adhd as well as autism, I have spent the last couple of days contemplating this idea for myself as well.

I am still not entirely convinced, but I am beginning to suspect that I might well be in this situation as well. After watching a number of YouTube videos from those with both autism and adhd and reading up on adhd, I can see a number of things that point on that direction certainly, although I'm not entirely convinced.

I have always been aware of the near overwhelming urge to either interrupt people, because there is something I want to say and if I don't then, then I know there is a more than a reasonable chance that I will forget what it was. I also have a tendency to want to finish people's sentences. Both of these things though I have taught myself to resist. Even though I feel a great deal of discomfort doing so. I am also more than aware that I can forget what I was saying, or thinking, halfway through a sentence. That digging through the trash to find the package with the instructions on, that I only just threw away after reading, is not uncommon. As is failing completely to understand or remember the instructions someone just gave me.

But then, my short term (working) memory is basically non-existent. But, I'm also aware that this is a fairly common problem for autistics and even before I realised I was autistic, I built up systems to help myself deal with this. As well as with my general forgetfulness. Lists, memory aids, even making the route out of my flat a trip hazard to make sure I don't forget to take something with me. Also, I live alone and essentially there is a place for everything and everything has its place. Not foolproof and I have lost things in a very small flat that I still haven't found. But generally speaking effective.

I struggle to start tasks, especially tasks that I have no real interest, or desire to do. Being interested in something has always been my main motivator. But eventually, I can normally force myself and work my way through things, especially if I know they are necessary. Knowing I have this problem is also why I hate leaving things to the last moment. I know that I am more than capable of doing that if I allow myself, but also that the stress from doing so is nearly overwhelming, even if it can be motivational. As is the stress of clutter. Not the organised clutter that is my flat, where I know where everything is, as in somewhere in that pile over there, but the clutter that builds up eventually and begins to feel as if it is out of control.

Novelty is a factor in my life. Or, boredom, rather. Because sooner, although far more likely later, I will grow bored with routines, or things like safe foods, and need to change them. Many of my interests also seem to suffer from a similar threshold. A certain point where I lose interest and no longer feel any need to maintain them, even though this might make me feel guilty about giving up on them. In fact, I hate boredom and I have always needed a certain amount of new things to watch, or discover and to be actively doing stuff, if only in my head. And whilst I have never thought of myself as being particularly spontaneous or impulsive. I am, within certain limits of self-control. There is a rationality that often has to be appeased that gives me a sense of control. I have also taken stupid risks and great risks. But rarely beyond what I knew was necessary, or to my mind, at least, controlled to a point.

I can be easily distracted, by random thoughts or by, (well obviously not squirrels, I mean who would be? but, oh, oh, there's a butterfly) things. But not always to the point that I'm not at least marginally still aware of what I should be paying attention to. Letting myself wander whilst maintaining at least a marginal awareness is an old trick of mine. I have always been a fidgeter, but that's also how I maintained concentration. Feeling the overwhelming need to move, has always seemed to me to be anxiety driven, or is the way I focus and think. In fact, movement for me has always been as much about settling and regulating myself, as it has been compulsive.

As I said, there are certain things that seem to fit, even if they also seem to have been effected and possibly modified by my autism. I would love to hear your thoughts.

https://beige.party/@niamhgarvey@mastodon.ie/112390279791932822#

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