@APBBlue@zirk.us cover
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APBBlue

@APBBlue@zirk.us

Just here to make silly jokes and friends. South Dakota native in D.C. I don't shoot dogs. #pottery #tea #chocolate #puns #49ers #cocktails #Crohns #POTS (not the ceramic kind). Terrible jokes autodelete after a week.

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jerry , to random
@jerry@infosec.exchange avatar

The most amazing thing just happened to me. I slept the whole night and did not need to take any sleeping pills. I thought there was going to be some kind of extended fight with my brain to start sleeping unaided, but no. THE FIRST NIGHT I was unemployed.

APBBlue ,
@APBBlue@zirk.us avatar

@jerry ❤️

jerry , to random
@jerry@infosec.exchange avatar

I am officially unemployed

video/mp4

APBBlue ,
@APBBlue@zirk.us avatar

@jerry I hope you enjoy your freedom!

jerry , to random
@jerry@infosec.exchange avatar

Today is my last day at IBM.

I joined Netrex in February 1999 as a Unix admin

In late 1999 Internet Security Security Systems bought Netrex, largely for its managed services business.

In October 2006, when I was the director of IT, IBM bought ISS largely for its managed services business.

I was given lots of opportunities at IBM. Twice I found myself in the wrong place at the wrong time and was on a list to be let go, but other parts of IBM decided to pick me up. I once resigned to take a job at Deloitte, and at the time my manager told me that didn’t work for anyone and made it worth my while to stay. For many years, I led an incident response function for the strategic outsourcing business, which was later spun off to be what is now Kyndryl. I learned a LOT. I learned so much, in fact, that I decided to start a podcast in 2012, partly to make myself smarter, and partly in hopes that I could help the industry avoid the mistakes I was seeing our clients make on a near daily basis. I have deep scars from all the big security events of the 2010’s - heartbleed, shellshock, wannacry, notpetya, and many others.

In 2019, I was leading an internal practice around cyber regulations (in addition to the IR role) and ended up helping the cloud business out of a sticky situation. Unbeknownst to me, cloud had been looking to replace their CISO, and in March 2020, they offered me the job. My first big test was leading Cloud through Covid.

I had the extreme privilege to lead a team of 184 remarkably talented professionals. We did some cool things, but I regret the long list of things that didn’t get done.

As well published in the news, IBM took a hard line on return to office, particularly for executives. They gave people like me a choice: relocate to a key site (Atlanta was not one of them) and work from the office 3 days a week (with tight attendance tracking), or be let go. I have been working from home full time since shortly after IBM bought ISS in 2006 - nearly 18 years. I spend about 1/3 of my time at my beach place, which I was not willing to part with. Plus, I fundamentally disagree with the return to office approach and with how people have been treated, so I opted to “let it happen”, and so today is the day IBM terminates me.

I’ve saved up enough money that I can take a break for a while. It’s been 32 years since I’ve had more than a week off work, and at least 20 since I’ve had any sort of vacation that wasn’t disrupted by urgent meetings, crises, and so on. I’m going to spend some time with my family, especially my extremely patient wife, in ways that I haven’t been able to.

I have a very long list of things I’ll be doing during this downtime. I intend to get back into podcasting; I am going to write some including maybe a book; I am going to focus more on the fediverse instances I manage to ensure they are enduring; I am going to way too many baseball games with my wife (she is a mega baseball fan); and I am going to take way too many pictures and hopefully find some creative ways to make money with those pics.

TL;DR: today is the end of a long journey for me, and the start of a new one. And it’s a good day.

APBBlue ,
@APBBlue@zirk.us avatar

@jerry 1. Congratulations on a job well done. 2. I hope you fully enjoy your well-earned time off. 3. Good luck in finding something awesome for what comes next!

APBBlue , to random
@APBBlue@zirk.us avatar

My head bone insurance changed with my new job, and my dentist doesn't take my new insurance, so that's super annoying.

APBBlue OP ,
@APBBlue@zirk.us avatar

@sollat I know -- I really like my dentist. 😐

futurebird , (edited ) to random
@futurebird@sauropods.win avatar

… and the stupid wind took my hat. I didn’t even have it on I was holding it worried about the wind — pulled it right out of my hand. How did people live wearing hats all the time!?

Maybe the MTA people have some kind of grabber??

APBBlue ,
@APBBlue@zirk.us avatar

@futurebird noooooooo! It looks like a very nice hat! 😞

APBBlue ,
@APBBlue@zirk.us avatar

@futurebird Very glad you got it back! 😁

ElleGray , to random
@ElleGray@mstdn.social avatar

cat. embodying the essence of cats. No.

APBBlue ,
@APBBlue@zirk.us avatar

@ElleGray agreed

ElleGray , to random
@ElleGray@mstdn.social avatar

[Thread, post or comment was deleted by the author]

    •
    APBBlue ,
    @APBBlue@zirk.us avatar

    @ElleGray Just to the end of the drink would be great.

    ElleGray , to random
    @ElleGray@mstdn.social avatar

    [Thread, post or comment was deleted by the author]

    •
    APBBlue ,
    @APBBlue@zirk.us avatar

    @ElleGray mmmmm

    ElleGray , to random
    @ElleGray@mstdn.social avatar

    don't get me wrong, the rap battle is fun, but a fight between men named Kendrick Lamar Duckworth and Aubrey Drake Graham should really involve dueling with swords at dawn

    APBBlue ,
    @APBBlue@zirk.us avatar

    @ElleGray also pantaloons

    jerry , to random
    @jerry@infosec.exchange avatar

    Now I know they are desperate for clicks, but the teaser for this fund raising grift seems pretty ill advised given current events

    APBBlue ,
    @APBBlue@zirk.us avatar

    @jerry lol

    Stoned_Deva_ , to random
    @Stoned_Deva_@mas.to avatar

    The older I get, the more impossible it is to open anything that's childproof. And though I may've sprained my thumbs in the process, these gummies were worth it.

    APBBlue ,
    @APBBlue@zirk.us avatar

    @sollat @Stoned_Deva_ @LibertyForward1 My migraine medication is nearly impossible to open without scissors. Which is not great for something I need to take IMMEDIATELY to avoid a headache!

    APBBlue ,
    @APBBlue@zirk.us avatar

    @sollat @Stoned_Deva_ @LibertyForward1 Just this past week I came to the realization that reading glasses might be helpful. 😐

    DeliaChristina , to random
    @DeliaChristina@sfba.social avatar

    whoooo is drinking unpasteurized milk? WHO.

    what's next, people, licking asbestos?

    anyway.
    today is a humdinger.

    APBBlue ,
    @APBBlue@zirk.us avatar

    @DeliaChristina hippy dippy white people who didn't get vaccinated for COVID-19 and are voting for Kennedy.

    jerry , to random
    @jerry@infosec.exchange avatar

    I get to go visit the house my oldest son and his fiancé are buying today. I have to say that it’s an odd realization that my biological purpose for existing is now complete.

    APBBlue ,
    @APBBlue@zirk.us avatar

    @jerry powering real estate transactions?

    (jk)

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