colonization is based in violence. -All- colonizing entities have been patriarchal as well as hierarchical in other ways (filled with assumptions about wealth, race, religion, abilities, etc). When oppression in your own family is "natural", then oppressing others is also "natural"
Colonization is our history. But it's certainly not the only way things could have played out. People who grow up in abusive homes have to -learn- that that other ways of living are possible.