The Monkey's Paw

GammaGames , in I wish for Linux to have a respectable marketshare of 20%
@GammaGames@beehaw.org avatar

The cloud now runs on macos servers

JungleJim , in I wish for Linux to have a respectable marketshare of 20%

Google forks Linux to make a mobile operating system, stripping out lots of familiar FOSS software and licensing requirements and replacing it with their own. Also it's written in java.

aBundleOfFerrets ,

What a miserable reality that would be

mojo_raisin ,

Also it’s written in java

Gag me with a spoon

actionjbone ,
@actionjbone@sh.itjust.works avatar

How unrealistic. That could never happen.

Sent from my Android device

mipadaitu , in I wish for Linux to have a respectable marketshare of 20%

Granted, every computer made in the last 20 years stops functioning completely. A handful of older computers are brought out of retirement, and the ones that didn't still have a working hard drive can only be loaded with older Linux based distros that are archived around the web.

The bulk of working computers are at large enterprises that haven't updated their server rooms in decades and run z/OS, AIX, windows 2000, RHEL, or whatever proprietary OS they were loaded with at the factory.

zero_spelled_with_an_ecks , in I wish I was good enough at football to play professionally

Granted. It's minor league. You make 40k a year. This, just barely, is a living wage. You never have enough to save. If you are ever injured, you will be destitute, both from the lack of income and the medical bills. The stress from it eats away at you. You start playing less aggressively to avoid that scenario. Eventually, you're at the bottom of the second string. You rarely are on the field. No glory, no enjoyment, no camaraderie with your teammates after a great play. Just a paycheck that barely keeps you alive, if you call that living.

voracitude , in I wish I was good enough at football to play professionally

Granted, but all the corruption finally catches up to FIFA and the organisation crumbles. Professional games may resume at some point in the future, but it's uncertain; first, your contract falls through, and eventually all players are forced into their "backup career". Football is no longer televised, and all you can find are pickup games down the local green.

friend_of_satan , (edited ) in I wish I was good enough at football to play professionally

[Thread, post or comment was deleted by the author]

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  • Fubarberry OP ,
    @Fubarberry@sopuli.xyz avatar

    Oof yeah, didn't notice the typo until now.

    Fixed now, although that may make your answer look somewhat odd.

    Death_Equity , in I wish I was good enough at football to play professionally

    Granted, you qualified to be on the Special Olympics Soccar team.

    survivalmachine , in I wish I was good enough at football to play professionally

    Granted, but it's American football and you can't remember your own children's names by the time you're 35 due to CTE.

    De_Narm , in I wish I was good enough at football to play professionally

    Granted. You have a series of career ending concussions in your first season.

    DebatableRaccoon , in I wish I was good enough at football to play professionally

    Granted. A large portion of your salary goes to private acting classes to better feign injury when being tackled.

    KidnappedByKitties , in I wish for free healthcare in my country

    Granted - Free euthanasia for any- and everyone, quick, painless, and guaranteed no sick people!

    livus , in I wish for free healthcare in my country

    Granted, your free healthcare system is homeopathic and your surgeon general is Gwynneth Paltrow. But it's completely free!

    Fubarberry OP ,
    @Fubarberry@sopuli.xyz avatar

    My greatest fear

    TheRaven , in I wish for free healthcare in my country
    @TheRaven@lemmy.ca avatar

    Granted. You didn’t define the word “free”. Everything now costs so much more, and it’s all unregulated. Doctors perform surgeries that aren’t necessary. They prescribe extremely harmful drugs. Going to a doctor is now just as risky as trying to deal with the disease by yourself. There are doctors on every street corner offering cures that don’t work, and you can’t tell the difference between a good doctor and a quack.

    Pharmaceutical companies now freely and openly push doctors to prescribe more drugs that don’t work. They increase prices astronomically. Even an Advil costs over $100.

    The death rate increases, and everyone tries to deal with their dead themselves because having a hospital deal with bodies is too expensive. This leads to an even further spread of disease.

    actionjbone , in I wish for free healthcare in my country
    @actionjbone@sh.itjust.works avatar

    Granted. You blink, and when you open your eyes you're in Germany. You're a full German citizen. You own a lovely flat in Munich. Your phone is full of contacts - people and family and friends throughout Germany. You have a German driver's license, you have a job at a German company, and your bank account is filled with Euros.

    You speak no German.

    Deceptichum ,
    @Deceptichum@sh.itjust.works avatar

    You know all those news stories you hear about “Person wakes up and can only speak a language they never knew before”. That’s the cover story for these events.

    metallic_z3r0 ,

    Which is largely fine, as most Germans speak English.

    ThrowawayPermanente ,

    I 100% thought that twist was going in a different direction. Other than getting fired in fairly short order, this sounds kind of fun and exciting.

    livus ,

    I honestly wouldn't mind this.

    MisterNeon , in I wish for free healthcare in my country
    @MisterNeon@lemmy.world avatar

    Granted. If you choose to participate your likeness, fingerprints, dna, medical history, and potential children naming rights now belong to some tech startup without proper data security.

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