nossaquesapao ,

I don't choose. To continue living is just the default, and time keeps passing, so I'm alive by inaction...

Kwakigra OP ,
@Kwakigra@beehaw.org avatar

Choosing the default is still a choice. Why is the default better than the alternative in your opinion? Please don't answer that question or even consider it unless you already have an answer. I would rather not have to ask this myself to be honest.

nossaquesapao ,

I don't have a full answer, so I won't try to answer it right now, but I will surely think about it during the next days.

sneezycat ,
@sneezycat@sopuli.xyz avatar

I'd argue "choosing the default" is not what's going on here. If you don't have mental health issues, you don't think that much about living/not living, it just is what it is.

It's be like saying I'm choosing not to listen to 80s Korean funk, or choosing not to go ski to the Himalaya. I literally don't care, and I haven't chosen "not to", because I literally haven't given it any thought.

Actually, 80s Korean funk sounds rad, I should give it a listen.

salarua ,
@salarua@sopuli.xyz avatar

to spite entropy

Kwakigra OP ,
@Kwakigra@beehaw.org avatar

Cheers, mate.

shinigamiookamiryuu ,

I did not choose the living life, the living life chose me.

wesker ,
@wesker@lemmy.sdf.org avatar

Too a stupid to die.

Kwakigra OP ,
@Kwakigra@beehaw.org avatar

I'm not sure whether I'm too stupid one way or the other, but at least I know I'm stupid.

Achyu ,

Wanting to live is the default for most, even before we become fully aware of ourselves.

The question is, what would make you choose not to?

Kwakigra OP ,
@Kwakigra@beehaw.org avatar

I've always felt that my note would make anyone who read it glad that they no longer have to deal with someone as indignant and sanctimonious as I am. The fact that most would react to need this way is part of my reasoning against continuing in this world, but in spite of the failings of my species I like other people regardless whether they're safe or not. I'd like to see what happens for my personal interest, but I completely understand anyone who wouldn't be able to tolerate this life at all.

SwingingTheLamp ,

Sheer bloody-mindedness.

Kwakigra OP ,
@Kwakigra@beehaw.org avatar

I feel you on this. I often feel I'm living for pure spite.

Drusas ,

Dog.

Kwakigra OP ,
@Kwakigra@beehaw.org avatar

I'll be getting a dog soon. Thanks for this, it's too easy to forget how cool dogs are when you don't have one.

Drusas ,

They really are the best companions, but you get as much as you put in.

bestusername ,
@bestusername@aussie.zone avatar

Can't afford to die; it's like $2700 just to dig the fucking hole!

Kwakigra OP ,
@Kwakigra@beehaw.org avatar

Thanks for the reminder. I'll make sure they know my body belongs in the trash can (in a few decades).

Empricorn ,

On this overpopulated planet, burying the dead seems like the biggest, most expensive waste...

bestusername ,
@bestusername@aussie.zone avatar

Mate you can send my corpse feet first through a wood chipper and fertilise a veggie crop... But it's not legal.

So at some stage my family is going to have to make a choice and fork out a stupid amount of money.

Vaggumon ,
@Vaggumon@lemm.ee avatar

I'm a coward.

Kwakigra OP ,
@Kwakigra@beehaw.org avatar

I'm here too and in my case I'm damn sure it's something other than cowardice. I know I'd sacrifice myself in less than a second given the opportunity and I even know how I would, but I haven't. There's a reason we're still around even if we don't know it consciously.

classic ,

I don't want my parents to experience my death / want to make sure they are helped in their last years. I've told them that there's an expiration onn that though. Like, you wanna live to 100? You'll be doing it without me.

DashboTreeFrog ,

Bad times tend to pass. I find myself forgetting in the moment sometimes and yeah, life is frequently enjoyable in lots of different ways, so I try to remember that.

Kwakigra OP ,
@Kwakigra@beehaw.org avatar

I'm intending to build a more frequently enjoyable life. I may have to do some surgery before I'll be able to forget things in the moment though.

queermunist ,
@queermunist@lemmy.ml avatar

I want to see what comes next.

We live in interesting times!

Kwakigra OP ,
@Kwakigra@beehaw.org avatar

This is actually my primary motivation. I have some morbid curiosity about what we're going to do to ourselves next.

user224 ,
@user224@lemmy.sdf.org avatar

I don't have ths balls to kill myself, nor access to guns. Other methods tend to have lower rates of success, and a failed suicide attempt is a pretty scary thought. While unlikely, even shot to the head can be survived. Especially if you accidentally move the gun while pulling the trigger which I heard does happen, only causing severe brain damage, but not death.

So yeah, I've got no balls and nobody else to kill me. That's about it. Not worth the risk yet.

Kwakigra OP ,
@Kwakigra@beehaw.org avatar

Whenever I hear this I always feel it takes a lot more guts to understand why not to but continue to choose to live anyway. Death is a comforting certainty while living is the way we know it to be. Hope you and I will be able to feel differently and be more comfotable with the idea of continuing through this world.

Fizz ,
@Fizz@lemmy.nz avatar

Life is interesting. Even on the most mundane boring day I can entertain myself in my thoughts. I don't really get extreme mood swings like when I was a teenager. No matter how sad I am it doesn't feel like the world is over. It's enjoyable to exist from the small things like sun shining on my skin to the milestones.

If my life ever changed and I was struggling with no chance of getting back on track I would consider changing my outlook.

Maeve ,

Because for all the suffering and horrific ugliness, there is still beauty and joy. The smile of a neighbor, the red-headed woodpeckers and their mates that visit, the stray cat that hangs out, my adult child's "I love you," and sharing of joys and challenges. My fur baby's cuddles, my dear friends' messages from afar. A walk at dusk in summers, sunsets and sunrises, the sound of rain and thunder, the call of tree frogs, watching deer walk and rabbits and squirrel play. A cool breeze, the taste of water, a berry, home made relish from my neighbors, laughing, crying, and emotions that can't be articulated but explored. Being at peace with myself.

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