Having a ton of experience in the service industry, I can say this is not all that uncommon. You gotta get all of the employees together And sit your boss down. Tell them she’s causing problems, and hurting the customer experience. Lie to the boss if you have to, that customers have complained a few times about when you’re left alone, things are taking too long. Definitely tell them about eating off plates before they go out. That’s fucking insane. And disgusting.
But the more support you can get from other staff on this, the more powerful your complaints will be.