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oseagh

@oseagh@hcommons.social

I'm a middle-class, middle-aged white man trying to be humble and open. See pinned introduction below for more.

This profile is from a federated server and may be incomplete. For a complete list of posts, browse on the original instance.

futurebird , to random
@futurebird@sauropods.win avatar

Maybe we need to make some space to have conversations about the way that rigid gender expectations can hurt people. I'm not talking about trans people, exclusively (in fact the trans people I know are among the most sophisticated when it comes to processing these kinds of events and emotions)

No, where I see a lot of unprocessed trauma flailing around putting everyone in a bad way is from cis people who have unexamined psychological harm due to their failure to conform to some gender norm. 1/

oseagh ,
@oseagh@hcommons.social avatar

@futurebird I really appreciate this post. I grew up as a cis het boy with small feet. Absurdly, I took a lot of shit for this as a teenager, lots of subtle and not so subtle attacks on my perceived masculinity. Decades later, I'm still healing from it, still trying to bundle up all the internalized masculine norms and the shame, isolation and violence that grow from those norms, and throw them out of my psyche.

I do have some gratitude for my small feet now. I realize they forced me to approach masculinity from a different angle, and I think I'm a happier and healthier adult man because of it.

All that is to say, solidarity from an otherwise privileged cis het man who has felt the sting of bullshit gendering!

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