Comrade, the pronouns you are looking for are any/all. I know lots of nonbinary people who have that listed as their pronouns. Everyone I know understands those pronouns represent a flexible and nonspecific attitude towards one's own gender, and they aren't a dogwhistle or anything.
Also if you want to understand your gender identity better I know some queer discord servers that help questioning people. And comrade, it is plain to see you are questioning so hard you might as well be dressed as the Riddler.